The Monkey (2024)

Release Date: February 21, 2025
Director: Osgood Perkins
Starring: Theo James, Elijah Wood, Christian Convery, Tatiana Maslany

What Happens When You Can’t Escape a Toy?

You ever pick up an old childhood toy, dust it off, and get hit with a wave of nostalgia? Well, imagine if that toy was actively trying to kill you. That’s The Monkey in a nutshell. With a premise that sounds like Chucky but with a wind-up monkey, I thought I was in for a wild, campy horror ride. Spoiler alert: I was very, very wrong.

Alright, so I decided to hit up the cinema and check out The Monkey. Now, let’s be real, I’m not usually big on horror, but every now and then, I’ll give one a shot—especially if there’s a creepy doll or, in this case, a murderous monkey involved. And, as per tradition, I wasn’t about to sit through a horror movie sober, so a couple of glasses of wine were definitely in order. Got to the theater just in time for the trailers, settled in, and prepared for whatever madness was about to unfold.

The Premise: A Deadly Toy That Won’t Quit

The movie kicks off with a guy looking absolutely terrified while trying to sell a monkey. Not a real one—a wind-up toy monkey that plays its little cymbals. He’s panicked, desperate to get rid of it, and—yep, you guessed it—the moment the monkey starts playing, someone dies. Off to a decent start, right?

Then we meet James, played by Theo James (White Lotus fans, you know what’s up). He’s our main guy, and he narrates the film, giving it a storybook feel that could have been effective—if the script didn’t completely fall apart. James and his twin brother Hal (also played by Theo James) discover their father’s old toy monkey, and guess what? The second they bring it home, people start dropping like flies. Every time the monkey plays, someone dies. The only way to stop it? Someone has to unwind it. Simple enough, right? Yeah, except these guys have the worst luck and the worst plans.

The Good: Cinematography & Atmosphere

I have to give credit where it’s due—the cinematography was solid. Osgood Perkins knows how to create unsettling visuals, and some of the eerie, dimly lit shots really worked to build tension. There’s something genuinely creepy about that little monkey, and the film plays with shadows and silence in a way that could have made for a truly chilling experience. But good visuals can only do so much when the writing isn’t pulling its weight.

The Bad: The Script, the Pacing, the Everything Else

Where do I even begin? The script is a mess. It tries to balance horror, psychological drama, and family trauma, but instead of blending into something compelling, it just ends up feeling disjointed. The movie can’t decide if it wants to be a fun, ridiculous horror flick or a slow-burn psychological thriller, and that identity crisis is painfully obvious.

The pacing? Brutal. The middle drags on forever, with too much talking and not enough monkey madness. At one point, I checked my watch and realized there was still nearly an hour left. That’s never a good sign.

And then there’s the dialogue. I don’t expect horror movies to have Oscar-worthy writing, but at the very least, I’d like the characters to speak like real people. Instead, we get clunky exposition dumps, awkwardly forced emotional moments, and horror clichés that feel like they were pulled from a how to write a scary movie manual.

The Twin Gimmick: Unnecessary at Best

James having a twin brother played by the same actor could have been interesting—maybe a metaphor about duality, or a way to explore their past trauma—but instead, it just feels pointless. Theo James does his best, but the twin dynamic is underdeveloped, and their backstory is vague and uninteresting. I kept waiting for some big revelation about their father’s connection to the monkey, but it never really comes together in a satisfying way.

The Kills: Brutal, But Not Enough to Save It

If you’re a fan of gruesome deaths, The Monkey at least delivers on that front. The kills are shocking, graphic, and creative—when they actually happen. But they’re so spread out that they don’t carry enough weight. You’d think with a movie about a cursed monkey, we’d be seeing bodies drop left and right, but no, the movie wastes too much time on unnecessary filler instead of embracing its ridiculous premise.

Why Won’t They Just Destroy It?

Seriously, it’s just a toy. Throughout the film, characters try to get rid of the monkey, but it always finds its way back. They throw it away? It reappears. They try smashing it? Nope. Burn it? Nice try. Yet, despite all of this, they never actually make a serious effort to destroy it in a logical way. I kept yelling at the screen, “JUST PUT IT IN A WOOD CHIPPER,” but alas, no one listens to the audience.

Black Bear, We Need to Talk

Look, Black Bear, I have some questions. Who approved this script? Did no one think to tighten it up a bit? Because this could have been a fun, dumb horror flick—the kind you watch with friends while making jokes and yelling at the screen. Instead, it tried to be something deeper, and in doing so, lost whatever entertainment value it could’ve had.

To make matters worse, the ending is so unsatisfying. No spoilers, but let’s just say it falls flat in the worst way. After sitting through two hours of buildup, I expected something—a big twist, a final scare, anything—but nope, just a frustrating conclusion that left me regretting my life choices.

Would I Recommend It? LOL, No.

Here’s the thing—if you’re a die-hard horror fan who watches everything, sure, go for it. But for the average person looking for a good scary movie? Nah. Save your money. Even if you end up on a desert island with only one channel, I’d suggest staring at the ocean instead.

If you’re into cursed object horror, just go watch Annabelle or Child’s Play. At least those films knew what they were trying to be. The Monkey had potential, but it fumbled it hard.

Final Rating: ⭐⭐⭐ 3/10.

Anyway, off to find a bar and forget that I wasted two hours of my life on this. Until next time, it’s the Tipsy Critic signing off. Cheers!